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Captain Robert
Abney Park
Abney Park makes Capitol Records really insecure 
12th-Nov-2009 04:01 pm
Yes, believe it or not I've spent the whole afternoon arguing with a Capitol Records A&R rep explaining how neither Abney Park, nore the rest of the music industry, needs them anymore. We've been turning down a lot of this kind of thing latly. Maybe I need a Tatoo on my forehead saying "no, I really don't want to owe you cash (and my soul) for the rest of my life. I'm doing fine with out you".

He got offended, he got hurt, and finally he got defensive, saying:

“Btw Here's a pic for you so you know who I'am... I live in Beverly hills driving a Benz. This was taken last week at the Playboy mansion in Bel-Air …”



Ew...I will try to contain my jealousy. It must be GREAT to be able to touch greezy bimbos who are only near him because they are paid to be. That must ROCK. ;)
Comments 
(Deleted comment)
13th-Nov-2007 12:12 am (UTC)
Well, if he was trying to sign us, he'd better send photos of A LOT hotter women!

(Deleted comment)
13th-Nov-2007 12:12 am (UTC)
And judging from the look on his face, he looks totally coked up. Or else the girl to his right just stuck her finger up his butt.
13th-Nov-2007 12:13 am (UTC)
I get the feeling that if she tried, she'd find a carrot already there.
(Deleted comment)
13th-Nov-2007 12:12 am (UTC)
Heh, that's pretty much a complete FAIL to grok Abney Park on his part, methinks. Not everyone has your Hollywood criteria for success or the price of doing business, old chum...
13th-Nov-2007 12:14 am (UTC)
Now, if someone offered me a movie crew and buject, I MIGHT be willing to sign...


...but seriously, do I LOOK like I'm trying to conform over here?
13th-Nov-2007 12:21 am (UTC)
Veen could take them all. While eating toast. And sleepy.
13th-Nov-2007 12:32 am (UTC)
Agreed.
And I can totally understand being a bit disappointed to not be able to sign a band like AP, but using this pic, and that text as a retort?
...that's more layers of fail than I've ever seen.
13th-Nov-2007 12:27 am (UTC)
HAHAHAHA those girls just look awful! And if I am seeing what I think I see, then I am seeing a picture that looks like the guy is airbrushed in there. Seriously. Glad you put him in his place, beneath your heel ;)
S
13th-Nov-2007 12:31 am (UTC) - re
just tell him one word RADIOHEAD and that you didnt like them suing the single mom for half a million dollars on downloading accusations
13th-Nov-2007 03:30 am (UTC) - Re: re
yup , and Reznor, and even maddonna! Everyone is dumping the dinosuars.
13th-Nov-2007 12:32 am (UTC)
Now now, I think some of the girls in that photo are rather attractive.

Tannie McDouchie on the other hand: it's sad that he has to surround himself with other people to add value to his miserable grifting existence, and that his expensive lifestyle still allows him insecurity.

THANK YOU for making your own way.
13th-Nov-2007 12:45 am (UTC)
oh goody! maybe now he'll take his barbies and go home to pout about it :P


*laughs* i still find it beyond hysterical(bordering on frightening actually) that there are so many people who can not even begin to fathom that you might not be dying to have what they have. that you can be perfectly happy and fulfilled with some other dream. *shakes head* ewwwwwww. who really does want that these days???
13th-Nov-2007 03:33 am (UTC)
, i am pretty certin those arnt HIS barbies, but may he will rent one for on, 7minutes or so...
13th-Nov-2007 12:54 am (UTC)
A Benz and mansion in Beverly hills. Color me un impressed.

I will admit that beverly hills and their multitude of driveways make excellent "oh shit we're going the wrong way down sunset, lets turn around" spots, but it's also butt-up against the skankiest section of Sunset,full of mansion-like homes that all look alike, full of benzes,...and therefore not all that stunning.

Gimme a flying car and a house shaped like a UFO, then we'll talk! That. would be impressive.

13th-Nov-2007 01:00 am (UTC)
I suspect that the man did not do his research. If he had he might have found that throwing airships your way might of met with at least consideration :)
13th-Nov-2007 01:22 am (UTC)
...does he honestly think that smart artists don't realize how he PAYS for his benz and playboy parties?

as to touching greezy bimbos that are paid to be there - it's the american dream, baybee. don't fault him for not having the imagination to see beyond what he's been told all his life to want.
13th-Nov-2007 01:26 am (UTC)
well, that is steampunk at its base: complete DIY, which you embody.
i'm assuming he's some suburban whitey who believes pamela anderson embodies the feminie vision of beauty. *retch*
best thing about having dipshits like that trying to ensnare people in their web is, they makes it easier for us to spot them.
besides, the fact you've got them chasing after you, plus a solid fan base of your own, obviously you're doing somethng right. you've grown without any help from them, just keep doing what you've been doing all along.
if they keep pestering you, record nathan diddling an annoying maritime jig & play it every time they call.
13th-Nov-2007 01:29 am (UTC)
Ye gods, man.. those women need to learn the fine art of subtlty.

In all seriousness, I commend you for sticking with your convictions and not signing on with that head-hunted. I don't know how many people would come out and say that, but you did, and I admire you for it. You rock the docs.

If you're going to get a tattoo across your forehead, at least consider the classics. Like 'POOR IMPULSE CONTROL'.
(Deleted comment)
13th-Nov-2007 01:37 am (UTC)
What a cock.

Everytime I find out that someone like him works for the labels, I feel a little better about the way that they will be joining the dinosaurs soon.

It's like Karl Marx said: seize the means of production.
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